Thursday, October 25, 2012

His LOVE is Real



I have a personal story that I would like to share with you.  A few years ago, my mother and father came to live with us. My father was promoted to heaven before my mother. I was left with the care of my  mother in her latter years. As time went on, I became to realize that I really didn't love my mother. I became very critical and resentful of my role.  I tried to play the dutiful daughter, and thought that I was doing a great job, but what I didn't know was that the Lord knew my heart.

I had some childhood issues that I wanted to discuss with my mother, but I knew that if I did it really would hurt her, so I stuffed all my feelings and put on a smile  As a believer I was supposed to love and honor my mother, but I didn't. I didn't know what to do.  I confessed and confessed my sin. I cried and cried, I read my bible, I prayed with a friend, I told my husband and we prayed, nothing worked.  My heart was still bitter and resentful. This went on for months. I tried to cover it up and to serve her as a loving daughter. It was very hard. I thought that if I forgave her, God would cover it all up and she would never know how she hurt me.

All my efforts to love her kept failing, until one day, when I cried out to the Lord in my self-pity, He interrupted and said, "My daughter, be honest, you don't love your  mother, but I do. She's mine."   I was stopped dead in my tracks.  "Lord, " I responded, "I have to confess you are right Lord, I confess that I don't love my mother but you do.  You created her, you died for her, you gave her to be a mother for me.  Lord, forgive me.  I am so stuck!"  It was then that this beautiful revelation came to me, "My daughter, why are you not drawing on the Holy Spirit's love for your mother?"  Like a flash I knew what He was saying to me  (Romans 5:5).  The Holy Spirit was all I needed to love and to forgive my mother.  

WOW, what an emotional healing I received.  I was trying in my own strength to love, because I was supposed to.  Now, by faith I had the love of God shed abroad in my heart to reach out and love my mother, and it changed everything.  My relationship with my mother grew very sweet and before she died, she told me many times how much she loved me.

His kindness brought me to repentance and my dear mother went home to the Lord without ever knowing my sin of  resentment or bitterness. The Lord had removed it from my heart and replaced it with His love for her. I experienced the POWER of God's love, released through me, and I will never forget it. It was a miracle. As I grow more and more to know the Lord ,He is continuing to change me from glory to glory into His image.

5 comments:

  1. Dottie, this is an amazing testimony! PTL! And the reminder that we can never get enough of that His Spirit gives us HIS LOVE and that is enough to conquer and transform all of the un-love that we have within us. Thank you! {and, p.s. please call me or let me know if you're still having trouble accessing your comments...I am sorry if I left you hanging. I don't know what happened, but please let me help if I can!}

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  2. dottieinhim1/13/12, 4:37 PM

    Abby, thanks so much for the encouragement. I have spent the day trying to cartoon picture to my storytime with mommom. I think I will need more help with that. How will you get this message back?
    Love to spend some time with you again.

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  3. dottieinhim1/13/12, 4:41 PM

    I don't think I am still doing this right. I just found the reply. How will you gets this Abby? Because I already wrote something else earlier.

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  4. You want to hit the reply button to anyone's comment like you did the second time. If they entered an e-mail, it should e-mail directly to them. And yes, we can spend some time together next week? maybe? Maybe we could meet at Main St. Java considering we had to whisper here;} I love getting out these days, anyway, so it will give me an excuse! I can do 12:45-2:45 T-W-TH while JJ is at school. Just let me know!

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  5. Christy Lindsay1/15/12, 4:15 PM

    What a powerful testimony Dottie, thanks for sharing. I have been enjoying reading your blog so thank you for taking the time to do it. It reminds me of those wonderful times in your bible study a few years back. I am very thankful for those days. Sorry that I am just now getting around to commenting.

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